So Daniel was stealing.
Just little things.
A few extra cookies from the pantry when no one else was in the kitchen. A small match box toy from a friends house. A small chocolate bar was slipped into his pocket during a visit to the supermarket.
As his parents spoke with him after each incident, thy sensed Daniel was enjoying having both parents intensely engaging with him. He didn't enjoy the consequence they imposed (doing chores to pay back the value plus more of the goods that were taken) but he seemed to be basking in the process.
So his parents decided to ensure Daniel had quality time with one of them each day. This was just for 10 - 15 minutes each day, with special family time each week.
The stealing ceased.
Deborah was stealing too.
Her parents talked through the reasons why stealing was wrong, and had her write apology notes to those she stole from to go with the replacement items. They were calm and consistent. They noticed however that she was generally grumpy and irritable.
As they talked this through with Deborah, they discovered that she was always unhappy with what was happening to her. She was unsettled and always wishing she was somewhere else, with someone else, doing something else!
So her parents started a thankfulness journal with her. As she wrote down 5 things to be grateful for in each day, she began to see the showers of blessings rained on her each day by our good and great God. As she grew in thankfulness to God, her heart settled into contentment.
There were no more stealing incidents.
Douglas quite openly stated that he took thing because he wanted them. He was envious of the gadgets his friends owned, and wanted them for himself. Consequences seemed to be effective for only a few weeks.
His parents observed a pattern of selfishness in Doug's day. He always wanted to be first, to have the biggest piece and to be the best at everything.
So his parents implemented a daily plan of serving others. Douglas was given extra chores each day, times with siblings where they chose the activity, and was provided with opportunities where others went first, got the biggest piece and had the chance to be the best.
They also talked through the value God has placed in each person, as an image bearer of Himself. As they explored the Bible and came to know the God who created and loved each person, Douglas came to realise that his responsibility was to honour and love and serve others, not to seek his own gain through them. With God's help, his heart, and then his actions were changed.
