What's a good punishment for a 9 yr old girl who is being disrespectful?
Life lesson book.
Buy a blank hard cover exercise book.
For each offence have your child write
- what was wrong
- why it was wrong
- what to do next time
-how to make it right.
Then have them make it right and give an additional consequence
from the list in the previous post for an 8 yr old.
What do you do when your tween starts telling lies?
React firmly.
It is the little foxes that destroy the vines. Don't let this habit grow.
Be wise too. if you know they have not yet brushed their teeth, don't ask if they have
done this. Simply instruct them to brush now.
Do you think it is important for siblings to have their own room and space?
Yes and no.
If you can manage for each to have their own room, then they will learn to be responsible for their own things and their own area. It can also provide a clear place for homework to be done, time out to be had and quiet to be enjoyed.
If you can't, they will still learn each of these things, you simply have to be a little more creative.
Certain personalities will need a little more solitude than others, and certain children will need a little more space than others too!
You hear a lot about birth order behaviours. Do you need to do things differently with each child?
Books on birth order characteristics are certainly very helpful. As is information on personality or temperaments, gender differences and learning challenges. Our heart goals for each of our children are similar (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness,
self-control etc) yet there are many individual goals for each one too. The bible is the best guide book for parenting, remember that all others are secondary.
Can you give some ideas about how you stop materialism taking over the home?
Model your values.
Children will hear what you DO, rather than what you SAY.
Give away a piece of clothinge very time you get a new item.
Go to the park rather than the plaza.
Have relationship based social times (eg board game nights, pool parties, picnics),
rather than spending ones (movies, amusements, shopping).
Offer a chore for eaach "I'm bored".
Have a extra jobs list ready for when they do want to save up for something special.
Most of the asking disappears when they realise how many jobs it takes to earn a toy!
Limit birthday gifts to one small present from each family member.
Teach the joy of giving (through practice) and serving rather than receiving and getting.
What are appropriate consequences for a teen who flatly refuses to go to school?
I wouldn't be looking for punishments. I would be seeking to understand then address the issues behind this.
Are there issues with other students, the teachers, the work, a past or future event that needs focus?
Are there major social or relationship issues in the family or friendships that have changed or ceased?
Hopefully the teen has one adult they would feel safe to open up with and discuss this through with.
A younger teen obviously needs to be encouraged back to school, for an older teen it may be a sign that it is time to look for employment or other learning options.
How do you encourage teens to take responsibility for personal hygeine etc?
Your discussions need to be relationship based, rather than authoritarian, and based around the comfort of others (not having to smell their body odour, see their yelllow teeth etc).
Very calm, matter of fact, consistent consequences (with a touch of humour) are most effective for your teen.
How do I know God has chosen me to be the mum for my children? I fail so often.
We all fail. We all can't do it on our own.
We need God's wisdom.
we need the help and encouragement of other mums along the way.
Sometimes we need time out.
Seek to your best today, just for today.
To love, enjoy, play and smile with your children.
To focus on tomorrow, and tomorrows issues, tomorrow.
